Often, people feel stuck in their lives because of relationships and circumstances that feel out of their control. Maybe they feel dissatisfied, confused, and powerless, causing them to react to life instead of respond in line with what they say they value and want from their life. Sooner or later, they realize that if they continue this course, they’ll never become who they want to become.
I want to see people living at their best and making a difference in the world. That’s why I use one-on-one coaching to help people discover what they want out of life and the steps needed to get there.
Let’s talk about what this looks like…
My job as a life coach is to empower people to cross the bridge between where they are and where they want to be.
Let’s break that down. If I were coaching you, what would this look like?
“My job…”
My job is primarily to listen acutely and ask thoughtful questions. It is not to give advice or pressure, diagnose problems, or offer expert solutions. Instead, I listen with empathy and curiosity, using my own intuition and discernment to pay attention to the most important parts of what you say. Then I ask questions to increase your awareness and help you discover the path forward.
“…empower…”
I provide the support structure for change, but I do not try to change you because only you have the power to choose change. You decide what to focus on and what you want to do about it; then I partner with you to keep our conversations focused toward the outcome and goals you set. I will also encourage you, pray for you, and be your cheer leader as you discover the way forward.
“…cross the bridge…”
I create a safe space that gives you the freedom to share your feelings, thoughts, or story. This experience alone can change you. In addition, change happens as you hear the voice of your Father and allow him to fill your desires and give you a new identity. This is why I include prayer and opportunities for Jesus to speak within our coaching sessions. Finally, “crossing the bridge” also happens as you choose specific action steps that move you forward. Every session, I follow-up on previous action steps and help you choose new ones.
“…where you are…”
Change begins with an awareness of where you are, so in coaching, we spend time exploring this. What are you thinking and feeling? What desires might be driving you toward your actions? What beliefs or parts of your story might be holding you back from moving forward? How does your story shed light on your calling? Making sense of where you are now is a necessary starting point.
“…where you want to be…”
Coaching only happens when there’s a clear goal or goals you are working toward, or some change you are motivated to make. That’s why a part of the process is exploring and putting words to what you want. Maybe you want to be less frustrated with your children. Or more kind toward your spouse. Or more fulfilled in your work. Maybe you have a more tangible goal like wanting to write a book or find a new job. Any of these goals can be a starting point for coaching.
So how is coaching different than counseling? Or mentoring? Or spiritual direction?
First of all, there’s plenty of overlap. Also, there’s a lot of variation within each of these fields. But here are some general rules:
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Counseling and therapy are primarily about healing people, taking them from sickness to health (although many counselors do much more than this!). A counselor might be more like a doctor.
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Coaching works with people who are already at baseline (functional and able to make choices and act on them) toward greater fulfillment, wholeness, or maturity. A coach might be more like a personal trainer.
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A spiritual director helps you discern what God is doing in your life, where and what he is speaking, and how he is working in order to strengthen your relationship with him.
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A mentor is someone who is further along in their journey and able to share their experience or story with you in a way that teaches, trains, or somehow helps you walk through similar experiences.
Within coaching, you might discover that healing happens, or you may experience the relationship as therapeutic. Maybe you will find that you are better able to discern what God is doing and how to participate in that. Or you may discover that I walked a similar journey to yours and you want me to mentor you. While there are aspects of all these fields that might show up within our coaching relationship, my primary framework is what I described in this article. Any other approaches fall within that.
And just to be clear: all of these people-helping approaches have a place. While one approach may be more helpful for a particular situation, as a general rule, one is not better than another.
Too many people keep going through life dissatisfied or confused because of relationships and circumstances that feel out of their control. Through one-on-one coaching, I help people discover what they want and the steps needed to get there so they can live at their best and make a difference. So if you or someone you know wants to discover the way forward, book a free first appointment with me by calling 570-509-3289 and discover if coaching is a fit.
Until then, live your life to the fullest, and let your heavenly Father fill you up!
Laverne Glick, Life Coach
570-509-3289